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New Family

This past weekend was an exciting one.  I finally got to meet my 2 week old cousin Kyleah.  She is tiny, precious, and perfect.  My aunt and uncle are so proud of their daughter. 

Kyleah Alexis  <3

The New Daddy

The New Mommy

She is so small and sweet!  And looks just like a doll!  Absolutely perfect!  I just love her!  And so does her big cousin B.

Yes, I made her a Steelers headband.       

And here is her little cousin, not quite 8 months old, trying to get a peek at the new addition. 

It was so nice welcoming her with so many other members of my family.  I love get togethers and we don’t do that often enough.    

Sunday was a HUGE day for my sister and I.  We have 2 sisters and 2 brothers that we got to meet for the very first time!  I was a bundle of nerves, and full of excitement all day.  My siblings mom was hospitable enough that she invited my mom and dad along.  I am so so thankful for her kindness and that my parents agreed and came along with my sister and I, and our families.   Everyone got along great and I don’t think the day could have been better.  My oldest, younger sister (does that make sence?) has 4 kids too!  So we got to meet 2 of our nieces!  The girls all got along so well.  I can’t wait to spend more time with my sisters.



I hope you all had a fantastic weekend and put that beautiful weather to good use.  Because today, its cold!  I have a busy week ahead.  I have to finish up everything for my craft show by Friday!  If you’re local please stop by.  We will have a ton of stuff for your little princess!  You won’t want to miss out.  :)


The Boy

My son.  Maxtin Jayse.  He is better than anything I could ever have asked for.  He has my heart.  

I wound up pregnant at 17.  Scared and ashamed.  I felt very alone during that time.  When he arrived on October 24th, 2000 I was overwhelmed with love and pride.  I had my son.  My baby boy.  I vividly remember those days when he was a little babe.  He was the sweetest, happiest and cutest little guy ever.  I miss those days a lot.  It was a struggle.  I worked part-time and went to college part-time.  Everyone loved him.  Having a supportive family made it easier.  When he was a preschooler we moved out of mom and dads and got our own apartment.  Those days were a treasure.  I was still working part-time.  But by this time I left college.  We spent our time together playing, reading, learning.  I couldn’t afford cable then, so we spent a lot of quality time together.  He was the smartest little kid I’d ever known.  And the most beautiful. Everywhere we went someone was giving me a compliment on him.  When I found out I was pregnant with B my biggest fear was not having enough love to share.  I soon discovered that love does not divide, it grows.  My son is a big brother to 2 little girls.  And a fantastic one. 

They fight.  A lot.  Mostly, he teaches them, and protects them.  He does what they want to do.  And most of the time will let them choose what to watch.  He is very tender, tucking his little sisters into bed each night.  And they love him more than anything.  

He’s a smart kid.  Smarter than I even know why.  I struggled in school very early on.  He gets Honor roll every quarter.  He brings home a lot of A’s.  My refrigerator is cluttered.  He loves reading.  He read 9 books for the month of March and wrote a report for each one.  He was richly was rewarded by his teacher, and proud of his achievement.  It fascinates me he enjoys a good book so much.  He has 2 A’s and 2 B’s right now.  He’s so bright.  I couldn’t be more proud of my boy.

He’s an athlete.  And he’s a good one too.  With a fantastic group of friends.  I’m proud of his outgoing attitude.  Not like me at all. He plays football, basketball, and baseball.

I love being his #1 fan.

He got to go to the symphony today with his class.  He was excited, because I used to play violin.  But tried to play it cool because he was asked to dress up.  Cool, 10-year-old athletes don’t dress up.  According to him.  This was the best I could do.  It was a compromise.  He got to pick out the pants and I got to pick out his shirt.  I couldn’t get him into khakis.  I tried.  But he looks pretty darn handsome to me.

We absolutely have a special bond.  We watched each other grow up in a way.  I love my boy so much.  He is one of my greatest gifts.  Perfect in every way.  I miss my baby boy.  But I am so proud of the young man he is becoming. 

I love you my sweet boy.  With all of my heart.

Love,   Mommy

Back on track

This post is a little more personal than normal.  I have been a suffer of depression for years.  It’s an up and down struggle for me.  Things got pretty bad in October.  After starting off on a great routine, I somehow struggled to get out of bed in the mornings.  I felt like a ton of horrible things were happening to me.  One of them still affect me.  Someone close to my family treated me really badly.  I still feel the brunt of that today.  I also got into a car accident.  It wasn’t serious, as in no one got hurt.  I had 3 babies with me that morning.  But I was seeing a chiropractor for a back sprain.  Soon after that, I found out that B, my 5-year-old had 7 cavities and a surgery was suggested.  Talk about guilt mixed in with fear and a Dad that disagrees with not only my decision to go through with it but advice saying the surgery was a “better option” from her very own dentist, her dentists nurse, her physicians nurse,  and 2 specialists.  There was a lot of arguing and the disagreement didn’t make the guilt from the cavities ease, but worse.  For some reason, a fluke, B was removed from our health insurance 2 days before the scheduled surgery.  I didn’t even know until I took her to the doctor for the pre-op physical and was informed there.  After everything was all  set to go for her surgery.  It wasnt a quick fix and according to the insurance company they don’t know what happened.  So I feel like a moron calling like a day or 2 before the surgery and had to cancel.  That has been on the back burner for months now.  I cried a lot this winter.  I stopped volunteering at Big M’s school.  Something that makes my life as a SAHM seem more fulfilling and less stoic.  Maybe that term is a bit strong.  I love serving at home, but at times I just go through the motions.  I stopped attending church as much.  Something I thrive on.  Something I need.  And love.  I stopped going to my connect group.  I stopped going to CR.  I stopped going to my “mom’s aerobic group”.  I really needed to be surrounded by all that love.  I really need to do those things to strengthen my faith.  And just connect with adults.  But I didn’t have the energy.  My life just stopped.  I spent my days sleeping a lot. 

The depression has gotten better with treatment.  I could still be doing more, but I just don’t.  And my only excuse is that I don’t have the energy.  I volunteered at Big M’s school this past week for the first time in months.  Volunteering at school made me feel really good and refreshed.  Honestly, the hours leading up to it, I was dreading going.  I can think of a million excuses.  Our evening would be spent rushing to eat an early dinner and rushing to get home and ready for bed because I had to take my children.  But, I’m really happy I went.  I spent the evening with 2 women whose company I enjoy and we laughed, drank coffee, snuck some cookies, and got to connect with other parents.  

 A few weeks ago, I was asked by a member of my church to serve on the Welcome Team.  I excitedly and gladly excepted and signed up right away!  I have thought about serving a lot but always talk myself out of it.  I have talked about my time management skills before and well… they suck.  I have 3 children that I basically do everything physically for.  Not complaining, but it is time-consuming and exhausting.   Today, the “First Impressions” group at church was meeting at 9.  I went to bed excited and ready.  I woke up at 7:30, well before my alarm.  As the morning wore on, my confidence was dwindling.  Satan was grabbing ahold of me.  Crumbling my self-worth and ability to be a good and faithful servant.  I actually picked up the postcard I got in the mail this week inviting me to the meeting and thought about canceling.  I quickly knew that was the wrong choice to make.  I wanted to commit.  I wanted to do this.  I want to serve God.  I went to the meeting.  I got there on time.  I enjoyed myself and met some great women there.  I’m very excited about serving God and proud I listened to Him when He reached out to me.  Like I said, I had always wanted to serve more in my church, but something in me always pulled me back.  It has been hard to get back into my routine but having such supportive friends and family has helped.  I have been praying each night and beginning to make time to meditate each morning and the path God had for me has been much clearer.  Life is Good.

Make-up Tutorial

 As I have stated before, I am a BzzAgent.  This is a Word of Mouth Marketing program and I get free samples of full size products to review and talk about.  I got my 3rd Bzzkit and I was really excited to try this one.  L’Oreal Paris Make up!  Yeah!  I have kind of an addiction to make-up.  In my BzzKit I got My L’Oreal Paris BzzGuide, Double EXtend Eye Illuminator Mascara and The One Sweep eyeshadow.

The eye shadow is a compact of 3 colors in one tray.  You sweep the applicator sponge over it to pick up all three colors.  Make sure you get the darkest of the 3 on the bottom and the lightest on the top. 

The applicator takes the shape of your eye lid.

This is what the eye shadow looks like applied.

Now onto the mascara.  The products I received were customized for my eye color as stated on the packaging of the mascara.  So these colors are for green eyes.  There are 4 mascaras available for a totally customizable look.

The mascara wand/brush.

Here is the mascara basecoat. 

The deer in headlights look.

The topcoat wand.  The topcoat has shimmer/glitter flecks in it.  It’s a poof ball at the end for precision.


And the completed look.


And a little vogue.

You can see the gold flecks a little better in this one.

Okay, now for the review.  First off, I used only the 2 products shown with the exemption of a little foundation.  No other tools or products were used.  This is not my “complete look”. 

The One Sweep Eye Shadow:  You must get the applicator flat to get color onto the entire applicator.  This is kind of awkward to do as the applicator is not very flexible.  I also like my lids to be a little darker and more sparkly.  This eye shadow is kind of matte.  The 2nd day I used this I put a few more coats on and it was a little more to my liking.  (not shown)

Double EXtend Eye Illuminator Mascara:  I don’t care for the brush.  It’s not special.  I like a big fat fluffy brush but to each his own.  The mascara alone wasn’t bad though.  The Topcoat wand, I felt like was so big at the end it pulled most of the sparkles off inside the product tube. This made me layer upon layer of the topcoat so I could see some sparkle (the bottom half of the wand is thin so it gets plenty of sparkle love).  And all the layering made my lashes stick together.  I think the sparkles had little to no effect.  Maybe I just need to practice with this wand a little more so I can get the full effect.

All in all these products are not my favorites.  I will use them again (already have).  But they are not my go-to gals.  Like I said about the eyeshadow, I liked the look a little better the second time I used them, but I also paired them with other tools and products, that I use on a daily basis.  Sorry L’Oreal =(    I think these products are a bit gimmicky.  =(

My adventful week (and it’s only Wednesday)

My trip to the eye doctor was not. fun.  I had to get my pupils dialated this time.  I had not had to have that done in years.  It burns, than it feels ok, than your eyes keep watering, than your vision is blurry, than you sit in front of a thing and stare into this bright light.  The brightest light I have ever seen.  Not once, but twice.  Than you start to get a headache and feel a little dizzy.  Than the Dr. tells me I’m so near sided that he had to check for signs of retnal detachment and that my eyes are long.  That still grosses me out.  Than he gives me these since my eyes are so sensitive to light.

Than I embarress my children by picking them up in these awesome shades!

Oh yeah, I was rocking ’em.

But alas!  That was Monday and Today is Wednesday and I got a call from the office telling me both my glasses are ready to be picked up.  YES!  I’m really happy with both of them.  I was a little nervous at first but I’m used to them now.

These are navy blue with light blue and white.

These are a dark brown with teal and black zebra stripes on the sides.

On to my next story of the day.  Still today, Wednesday, March 30th. 

I watch my nephew on Monday and Wednesday every week.  He is only 2 and loves to explore.  I put my girls in the bath tub and laied him down for a nap so I could work on this:

He went into the bathroom right under my nose, took off his socks and pants and did this:

Yupp!  He got right into the tub with his shirt and onsie on, and what I soon discover, a dirty diaper!  I get the girls out and get him out, undress him and remove his diaper.  I tell him to stay and not sit on anything so I can go throw the 10 pound diaper away, I come back and hes gone!  Back in the bathroom he went, naked as a jaybird, dirty butt and all trying to climb back into the tub!  He is so funny and such a handful sometimes.  But a joy to have twice a week =)

Blakes parent teacher conference was tonight and I completly missed my scheduled time.  Got there 15 minutes late and they wouldn’t see me.  So I feel terrible guilt about that.  Horrible.  I have no time manegement skills at all and I know to the outside world that makes me look lazy, careless, and like a bad mom.  I feel horrible.  =(

Onto some good news.  My family has been truly blessed by Christ this week.  My aunt and uncle adopetd a baby girl one day old Monday.  They kept this a secret from the family since Christmas, careful not to get their hopes up.  I just found out last night.  On their way home from the hospital with her.  They have wanted a baby for years and I think it’s awesome God chose them for this beautiful baby girl.  They’re going to make teriffic parents. 

Sorry I havn’t been on much this week but I have been terribly busy, and I have a craft show in 2 weeks!  I have some more things planned for the week.  Finally can someone tell me why Friday is April 1st and it is doing this outside????? 

Happy Spring!!~!!   =)

p.s.  I posted this without proofreading, editing, or spell checking.  please quit judging =)


B just broke Big M’S glasses!!!!! ~:<

It’s just one of those days.

Well, I haven’t felt very good the last few days.  It might be from enjoying all the beautiful “springy” weather last weekend and waking up to this yesterday.

Yes folks, that is SNOW.  It’s the end of March.  And we are still getting snow.  Monday it was near 70.  Right this very second its 32.  Not. Fun.  Looking at these pictures makes me shiver.

Well today, I let my girls have fun paint time in my bedroom.  When they went into the bathroom to clean up, I decided it was a fine time to shower.  My girls are almost 4 and 5 years old.  This is what happened.

Actually, the arms were so twisted I couldn’t even open them.  I tried to gently pry them apart and one arm broke off.  Let me tell you, I want to cry, I can not see a thing without my glasses.  I’m too exhausted to yell, but I’m really mad that they were so careless with other people’s property (OPP?).  Well disappointed.  Very disappointed.

This is my lens people.  They are THICK.

I was able to hot glue that broken arm temporally so I could safely drive to my eye doctor.  The nurse was able to salvage them by correctly straightening out the twisted arm and taping the other broken arm.  And they were able to get me in on Monday morning.  I’m relieved I don’t have to wait a week or longer.


At least she was able to temporally fix them to get me through the weekend.  I hope they last.  It’s going to be a good weekend.  Baseball, a Birthday Party for a good friend of my children, Diary of a Wimpy Kid with Big M and B, and a good group of friends.  And I always look forward to Church Sunday mornings. 

Now I’m headed off to pick up a friend of Big M and Wal*Mart to get some craft supplies =)

I hope you all take some time to yourself and enjoy your weekend.  =)